My Life Situation Now

This is a very personal article, dear reader, which you may or may not want to read once you know what it is about. You may find little value in it for how you are handling your life these days. However, it is something that I believe I must write given my situation.

I am trying to set out as best as I can my own life experiences these days. I feel the need to write about it to help myself by trying to get my concerns out of my system the best way that I can right now. Oh, it may not make a really good “news” story but it is just something that I must do for myself given what is happening to me in this very strange environment that we are now in. Who knows, it may impact something that you are dealing with as well.

I have a lot going on in my life now most of which was totally unexpected until fairly recently. These are now life-critical issues with which I must deal whether I want to or not. What is taking place right now is something that I am finding so difficult to handle.

Let me explain the impact this new situation is having on me.

As I am sure that you know by now, dear reader, there is my own personal, medical condition that could have very serious consequences for me. It is a well-known disease, cancer, which has treated very many people harshly for so many years. Then add on something new that just broke out that is impacting negatively the entire world it seems: coronavirus (COVID-19)! If you have been reading the newspapers or are watching the news on television recently, then you will now know much about a new illness that has all of a sudden arisen.

I have learned how to handle better my own situation because of the assistance that doctors have provided to me based on their medical experience. Yet, I cannot understand what is going on with respect to the new medical issue around the world. I have never ever seen anything like this before. I cannot believe that what I am reading is happening in so many countries everywhere at exactly the same time. I guess that I should be happy that, so far, no one has this disease in my area.

How can this be? Is this the new world in which we are living where there are no secrets anymore? Shall we now expect that, when something happens, we will learn about it right away because of our access to the Internet? The difficulty I am experiencing is how do I act now when something so disturbing like this arises near me, especially when I have new problems myself.

A proper question to ask now is how real is what we are seeing. I am wondering if this new disease is something that is actually taking place. Could it be instead that what is being put forward is designed to take advantage over us for whatever reason? Is it unreal propaganda that someone wants us to have to disturb us for reasons unknown at this time?

For me, while I appreciate this major, new, worldwide issue that has just arisen, I am living in different circumstances completely now compared with most other people. In several days, I have an appointment with my cancer specialist who is going to tell me what he believes are the results of the two month medical radiation program in which I participated. As you know, I was receiving treatment to eliminate or, at least minimize, the cancer that was found within me. Based on the results of some tests with another doctor whom I see, I am hoping that everything will turn out quite well.

I try very hard not to think about what is going to happen, even a few days before this appointment. In the past, thinking about the seriousness of my position caused major problems for me that seemingly caused me horrific medical issues. In fact, if you remember, in one instance, I had difficulty even walking because I was so upset. In reality, my condition was mental, worrying so much, when I thought it was all physical. To be honest, it was something that never happened to me before in my entire life that I can ever remember.

But, given what is going on now, should I be worried about myself at all with my own disease? I have seen some very high numbers about people who could be impacted by this new worldwide medical condition. So what if I have been treated well for what I have in my body now if this worldwide issue spreads so horrifically everywhere. I might find that I could pick it up quite easily with all of its negative effects quite soon. While you may not think about it the way that I am, and even not take what I am saying seriously now, let me tell you that this thought has come out and is giving me additional difficulties which I really do not need to have.

This whole worldwide medical condition is so bizarre in the Windsor area these days. News like this is coming out all the time now. I just saw the Windsor Mayor’s note on March 14 on the Internet which stated:

“Over the past few days, global circumstances have changed dramatically such that we have been concerned about our ability to return to Canada in a timely manner. Our efforts to return early have been futile as flights from Jordan are all full since this country announced the cancellation of all flights effective March 17…

New rules that went into place today now require my family and I to self-isolate for 14 days upon our return.

Although I (and my family) feel great and have no symptoms of any illness I will certainly follow the best advice of our medical professionals. Those who are travelling outside of Canada should follow the same protocols so that, together, we limit the possibility of spreading this virus.”

What is going on? He is not the only person who will be living in isolation for around 2 weeks as the media has reported. As an example, the Prime Minister has just announced that he is also going to be in isolation for 14 days. The Mayor of Toronto will be off for 12 days after returning from London, England. 

Nevermind just individuals, Government Offices are closing down for several weeks now for public visits, many retailers are sending out notices to their customers about how they are going to act so they will keep their business running and a number of organizations are closing down their operations for several weeks.

The obvious question to ask is how much more of this will we be seeing in the next little while. How much more will impact me?

I do not have the answer for anything. I have no idea how real or how significant this new disease is. I do not know if it will be experienced in our area anyway. At the least, I trust that the solution to cure anybody who may pick up this disease is discovered and is made available as soon as possible. (This result, regretfully, may not be finalized until sometime next year.) Naturally, until a few days from now, I can still start all of a sudden worrying about my existing illness and what the impact will be on me once I hear from my doctor.

Whew, this was quite something for me to sit down and write. When I read it again, before publishing it, I was pleased that I seemed to be better from an emotional perspective after understanding that I am trying very hard to deal with the situation I am in. I will still be nervous when matters like this arise again and scared too. That is just the way my life is now. I will have to learn though how to deal with this kind of situation. Hopefully, as I should learn shortly, I will see how successful I can become.